7:00 pm – Everyone was assembled in the conference room, their scripts at the ready. Again I got that sinking feeling that I was in over my head. I stared out at the group and my mind raced for something clever to say, but I had nothing. I pressed forward despite my fears and began the reading. It was a very humbling experience to have several talented people travel various distances to perform and be judged by me.
Who am I to judge them? Sure, I have this script and an idea in my mind of how I want it to come to life on film. How can I tell them they’re doing it wrong or it should be done like this. I suppose that’s what I am learning a director does. Sounds simple enough and with time and experience I am sure other directors take it for granted. It just feels, odd out of place for me to tell someone else how to do something when I am so flawed.
Thankfully everyone involved in this project is very accommodating and they have made the experience worthwhile. I know they can see me stumble and ramble sometimes. They politely wait and add their wisdom were its needed. For that I am grateful. I just have to keep telling myself this is my first project as a director I am allowed to fumble around a bit, I really hope it gets easy because I love the potential of it all.
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